HOOT Online, Issue 9, June 2012 – Micro Fiction, Poetry, Memoir, Book Reviews

 

THE PROBLEM WITH PRETTY GIRLS
by Michael Wayne Hampton


They pick you up with open bottles of vodka wedged between the seat belt and the emergency
brake. They hold a lit joint between their fingers while they talk to your dad in the driveway.
Their car has never had an oil change. Its tags are expired. Before you make it two blocks they
will race past a parked police car with the stereo blaring, their arms in the air, palms off the
wheel and dash and pressed against the ceiling. They’re laughing already. Nothing can touch
them. They wonder why you’re so scared?

 

 

JOAN OF ARC
by Matthew Porubsky
Visuals by Matthew Porubsky

My vision-mission
a trade of silk
for steel for shackles
for blisters.
I split like swords,
open wound prayers.
This heaven burns.

 

 

GAMESHOW
by Chapin Rose Gray


The child, asleep, has breath like dominoes,
eyelids like the softest parachutes. It’s the language of engines

you’ll be quizzed on: how does the plane say, hello,
or forgive me? Incrementally, or all-at-once?

In the middle of a morning sky the color of dishwater?

The cat sniffs moonlight on the windowsill.
Grief ’s littlest flowers.

 

 

TWO COUNTRIES
by Brian Beard
Visuals by Alex Norelli and Jane-Rebecca Cannarella

 

Country 30
The ladies who smash car windows at night will drive whatever distance is
necessary to attain their target. Their gutsy gaze swathes the broken landscape
with bandages of pale light.

 

 

 

Country 34
Their watercolor sidewalk graffiti is easy to miss. Their stilt shows are free. No
one thinks to bet on their chess players.

Their libel suits read like ads. Their cafés are friendly to cows. In the evening
young couples with expensive eyewear occupy the terraces, sipping
pomegranate juice and discussing the names of cats.

 

 

BOOK REVIEW
of Derek Sherwood’s Who Killed Betsy?
by Jane-Rebecca Cannarella

Derek Sherwood’s Who Killed Betsy? tackles the controversy of the unsolved
murder of Penn State student, Betsy Aadsma. Despite the complexities of the case,
Sherwood writes about the murder and the subsequent investigation in an accessible
way that allows the reader to follow the nuisances, and many details, of a case that has
covered over 43 years.

Many non-fiction accounts of murders tend to rely on grotesque details in hopes
to titillate the reader into reading until the end; but Sherwood gives accurate details in a
way that gives reverence to the fact that he is researching the tragic demise of a real
person while still capturing the attention of the audience.

The sound hypothesis of the identity of Aadsma’s murderer comes at the expense
of tireless research, but what might be the most fascinating part of this story is
Sherwood’s depiction of the silent character of the University, and the fear and paranoia
of valuing the legacy of the institution over the justice of finding a young woman’s
murderer.

More information at WhoKilledBetsy.org
Purchase book on Barnes & Noble or Amazon

 

 

HAIKU
by Donna DeForbes


The night wood—so still
so silent—like two people
falling out of love.

 

 

ELLEN BAKER WENT BACK TO BED
by Jade Ramsey

For twenty-seven years, she drank herself to sleep on her couch cursing God, who had
told Robert to divorce her. When he left, Ellen swore she wouldn’t sleep in a bed
without him. The television reflected the bottle beside her on the coffee table. Her once
smooth full face sank in from the weight of wrinkles and scores of cigarettes. She
stayed up waiting (wasting) for Robert to come home, her calico quilt draped over her.
Robert’s sister called to say that he lay hospitalized in Las Vegas. He had been missing
for ten years. He struggled to breathe under cheap white sheets in a beeping room.
Three types of cancer crept beneath his thin pale skin. He couldn’t even speak.
Ellen rose from the couch, put her bottle in the bin, and turned off her porch light.

 

 

Michael Wayne Hampton’s work has appeared in publications such as 3:AM Magazine, McSweeney’s, decomP, and Atticus Review. His fiction was recently nominated for Best American Short Stories. He can be reached at motelheartache.blogspot.com.


Matthew Porubsky
is a freight conductor for the Union Pacific Railroad and the author of two collections of poetry. Check out all the info at mppoetry.com.


Chapin Rose Gray
grew up near Mobile, Alabama. In 2010, she received an MFA from the University of Alabama. She currently lives in Chicago with her husband, Thomas, and her one-year-old son, Louis.


Brian Beard’s
countries come from a fictional travelogue. His work can be found in Poetry East and Red Rock Review and is forthcoming in Quiddity. He lives in Maine with his wife and their two sons.


Donna DeForbes
loves to play with words through writing and graphic design. She dreams big while living by the Bay in America’s smallest state. Swing by www.TheJoyfulWriter.com for laughs and inspiration.


Jade Ramsey
received an MFA from Bowling Green State University. Her work can be found in Concisely, REAL, Stone Highway Review, Gargoyle, and others.

 

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